HEAD FULL OF HONEY
Everything I know about Grandpa's illness
I learned from my doctor, Dr. Ehlers.
Grandpa has Alzheimer's.
People with Alzheimer's forget lots.
I mean, it's true that I often forget
what homework I have to do,
or to brush my teeth,
but with Grandpa it's different.
My parents wanted to put him in a home.
That's basically why
I've had to take things into my own hands.
We're heading to Venice.
He remembers loads about Venice,
although it's been 40 years
since he proposed to Grandma there.
People with Alzheimer's
might keep brushing their teeth
because they forget they just did it,
but they remember things like
that they flossed 25 years ago.
I never remember stuff like that.
Hi, Mom. Hi, Dad. I hope you guys are okay.
Don't worry about us.
We're sitting on a train, as you see.
And we had breakfast. Chips, because they're so healthy.
- Grandpa, want to say something? - What?
- To who? - Mom and Dad.
Hello?
They're gone.
Well, in any case, I love you.
See you tomorrow. Or the day after. Bye!
Where are you going?
Toilet can.
Oh shit!
Grandpa!
Hey, was that you?
Stop. police!
Grandpa!
That's us. Grandpa Amandus and me.
I now understand why Grandpa is the way that he is.
But I don't think I'll ever figure out
why my parents are the way they are.
Why do people change as they get older?
Like, all my parents talk about
is what happened last week or what will happen.
I mean, Grandpa has no idea
what'Il happen tomorrow or what happened last week.
And I sometimes think that's not such a bad thing.
Actually, it all started when Grandma died.
One might say that she brought
a hint of glamour to our village.
She wanted to discover the world...
- Do you think they'll burn her? - Who?
- Your grandma. - Are you crazy?
Then she'll just be eaten up by worms.
But Grandma's in a coffin.
They can get through that.
Can we change the subject?
Okay.
As long as a person lives on in our memories,
she is never forgotten.
What do you engrave on an atheist's tombstone?
Don't know.
- All dressed up and nowhere to go. - Very funny.
My dear Amandus,
the last time we spoke
you said you wished to say a few words about your wonderful wife.
Margarethe was...
simply wonderful.
And, above all, she had
a big heart and was warm and giving.
I'm not talking about her big breasts.
I know you all know them.
Can you say that when someone just died?
Margarethe always laughed at my jokes.
In return, up to the very end, I always ate her apple pie.
The one with a pastry lid and canned whipped cream.
She hadn't made that in years.
I could hardly even stand the smell of it anymore.
But I always ate it when she made it.
Because, ultimately, people are just creatures...
creatures of habit.
I'd have loved something different.
Like plum cake, perhaps.
Or maybe an apricot tart or...
Oh, that one... What's it called again?
Marzipan cake. Or... Oh, yes!
Cream puffs. I do love cream puffs.
They make the best marzipan cake at... At that place.
Now what is it called again?
The one at the intersection, where that house is,
the one they thingamajigged.
- Oh, stuff it up your ass! - Grandma!
But I'd give anything for a slice of your apple pie now.
My dear Elisabeth!
- Elisabeth? - His mother.
What on earth will I do without you?
Niko, I just hope one day
you too can find a woman who is as wonderful to you
as your mother was to me.
Till soon, my love.
After the funeral, Dad asked Grandpa to come and live with us.
Grandpa didn't want to. He said he couldn't leave Grandma alone.
Dad drove me to Grandpa's some weekends.
We'd always walk to Grandma's grave
to put fresh flowers on it.
I was alone at home a lot anyway.
I'm a latchkey kid, you see.
Plus, my parents often argue at home.
Because Dad had sex with this woman,
then Mom did the same with her boss at the Christmas party.
Dad was really angry.
But Grandpa said, "if the cockerel can play, then the hens can too."
Grandpa used to be a vet, you see.
Dad always says farmers would pretend their cows were sick
because they loved having Grandpa visit them.
When Dad told me things like that I could tell how proud he was of Grandpa.
Then one day he called us up
and said he had forgotten how to get to the cemetery.
Grandpa!
- Grandpa! - Hello?
- The police just called. - Why?
- They have your dad. - Where?
- At the station. - Why?
- You may want to sit down. - Stop babbling. What's up?
I'm not, I'm telling you about your dad.
Out with it!
He's filing a missing person's report.
- For your mother. - He's not...
Go get him. They'll keep him till you arrive.
- What's up? - Come on. We're going to pick up Grandpa.
- Hello. - I'm Mr. Rosenbach.
I'm here to get my father, Amandus Rosenbach.
Ah, the elderly man who reported his dead wife missing.
Here.
He left this here.
- Do you know who she is? - My mother.
- When she was young. - He brought it as a search photo.
- Where is he? - We took him home.
Why?
- Why didn't you keep him? - He insisted.
He'd never ridden in a police car.
Tilda!
My little principessa!
Look. I'm sure I know him from somewhere too.
Come in.
It's nice you came to visit me.
Here, come in and have a seat.
- Would you like a cookie? - Sure.
- Grandpa? 'Yes?
Why have you got all your food in the bookcase?
There was no space left in the dishwasher.
Looking for something?
- The cleaning lady. - I fired her.
- Why? - She was stealing.
What?
Your sister's jewelry.
I don't have a sister.
But you always wanted one, didn't you?
It's all right here.
Margarethe!
Isn't she gorgeous?
All the boys were chasing her.
Every one of them wanted to...
but it was me that she...
I mean...
- She wanted to with me. - You took that to the police.
- Why? - I was hoping you could tell me that.
I suppose I wanted to boast a bit.
Good God!
How was it?
- What? - In the police car.
Oh, yes.
It was worthwhile.
See.
- There's no way that's real. - Oh yeah?
Just watch.
Front sight, rear sight...
Now that's loud!
Yeah!
Have you lost it? Where did you get this?
Definitely not from Best Buy.
Dad, how about coming to live with us?
That shouldn't be a problem.
If you need me around.
But only if I can take some of my fur... fur...
Um... furry friends with me.
One, two, three, four, five.
A three and I've won again.
Amandus?
I'm contemplating my next move.
We're not playing chess.
Mom, let him!
Okay, fine. Go ahead and contemplate your next move.
If I move to the left here,
they'll cut me off from behind.
That wouldn't be smart.
That wouldn't be a smart move at all.
But you've got a clear run ahead of you if you go this way.
- You think? - Look.
You can't go this way, you said that yourself.
And if you go here you run the risk of...
an ambush.
But here, you'll be in the clear!
Thanks.
A six.
A six!
One, two, three,
four, five, six, seven...
There.
You rolled a six, not a ten.
- Are you nuts? - We play by the rules.
Who wants to play by Grandpa's rules?
Not a scratch.
You can unload it here and take it in.
- Take it in? - Fantastic!
Is this "Candid Camera"?
Niko, we never agreed to this.
We said what was dear to him, not all his old junk!
- Now that does it! A fridge! -It's his bookcase now.
Niko, all this garbage totally clashes with our decor.
- This isn't a junk room! - Come on.
His stuffs important to him.
- He's happy. - That's what counts.
I need a Jégermeister now.
- Watch it, hobbit! - You watch it!
You're all arms and no brains! Shit!
- The fridge goes in the bathroom. - No, Amandus! Stop!
You either put that stuff in the barn,
or in your room, and I mean all of it!
Move out, fellas!
Here. We forgot to unload this.
Here you are.
Now it's all back!
Good.
Now, you're a real looker.
Amandus, could you pass me the bread?
Amandus?
The bread?
What about it?
Thanks, but I asked your dad.
Amandus, please stop.
-It's annoying at dinner. - Mom!
-It's true! - Can't do anything here.
- Home was more exciting. - Carry on then.
I'm nearly finished anyway.
- Don't want to now. - Aw!
It's your own fault.
Boflng!
Tell us the story about how you met Grandma again.
God, no.
Then you tell us the story about, um...
Um, that... Your boss.
How did the two of you meet?
How does your dad know about that?
How he knows? I told him.
Great.
Niko?
I know you don't want to hear it, but your father's pretty confused.
My father's fine. Can we sleep now?
I'm fed up.
Totally fed up.
Wohlleben's an idiot. He's no good at explaining.
Yup. He's such a complete retard.
- You can't say retard. - Fine, then he's a tosspot.
What's a tosspot?
Someone who tosses pots all day.
Do you want a coffee too?
Grandpa, I'm only 11 years old.
True. You're getting on a bit as well.
Do you want a coffee too?
Yes, sure.
I love coffee.
Grandpa, you have to put water in it.
Should I help you?
No need, I've made coffee before.
Already heating up.
Nearly done. Just has to brew for a minute.
Can you help us?
Yes.
REDUCING AND EXPANDING FRACTIONS
No, I... I can't do this.
We never did that when I was in school.
We just let our fractions stay whatever size they were.
You left them how they were? That's much cleverer.
That's right.
The most important and difficult thing...
You're very pretty.
Shall the two of us maybe...
go for a coffee?
Go!
Get lost!
- Go, go! - Amandus?
- Could you cut the hedge for me? -|... I can do that.
Great. Just clean it up. Just four inches or so.
- Can you manage that? - No problem, right?
Four inches. Sandra.
- Sarah. - That's a nice name too.
Crap.
- What are you doing? - I'm trimming the... the...
The greenery.
I said
four inches!
Exactly.
But, well...
I'd say it was much nicer higher.
Should I leave this section?
Or chop it?
It's your decision.
Where's Amandus?
I've called him twice. He's under our roof.
The least he can do is eat with us.
He's in the garden trying to fix the hedge.
Fix it?
It took five years to grow that high.
Five fucking years!
Mom! You can't say "fucking".
It's true... I'm sorry, sweetheart.
Niko, do something. What will he ruin next?
We'll go to the nursery and order a new hedge.
Where did you get those?
From your garden.
Do you like them?
- Are you trying to drive me mad? - No.
I'm trying to apologize to you.
- Sandra, sorry that I... - Sarah.
Didn't trim the Sarah properly.
That I didn't cut myself properly...
- To do the... - Hedge.
The hedge...
Great, Amandus!
Now when my guests arrive,
instead of a beautiful high hedge, they'll see...
next-door's tacky gnomes!
And when they enter the garden...
Thank you so much. Bravo!
Elisabeth was so very fond of roses.
Dad, Mom's name was Margarethe.
Fine, then. Margaritas.
Tell me a story, Grandpa.
A story?
About you and Dad, when he was my age.
You sure ask tricky questions.
Remember when we camped?
In the yard.
To make it exciting, Grandpa told me
our yard
was full of raccoons and foxes at night.
So we grabbed spades, broomsticks,
anything we found in the toolshed,
to arm ourselves to get safely to the tent.
Yes, you...
- You even took your fishing rod. - You remember that?
How could I ever forget that?
As if you can chase off a raccoon with a fishing rod.
Once we are lying in the tent,
I hear this really strange noise.
A kind of wailing, sort of a "Whoooh!"
He says it was a raccoon.
And I say, "Raccoons don't howl!"
He says, "They do around here."
I still don't know if howling raccoons exist.
- That was me. - No!
You never told me that.
You never asked me.
I spoke to a doctor today. He'd like to examine you.
Why?
- Because“. - Because I'm an idiot?
You think I don't notice?
Dad, you're not an idiot.
Of course I am.
- I'm not going to the doctor. - Maybe he can help you.
You sound like your mom.
She wanted you to see a doctor?
I don't remember anymore.
But he can't help me.
I'm definitely sure about that.
INVITATION
Do you prefer brown or beige?
- Beige. - You sure?
Then brown.
- You didn't even look. - I've got bigger worries
than our damn summer party!
Did you speak to your dad?
- Yes, he won't. - What do you mean?
- He doesn't want to be examined. - Now what?
Nothing. My father's a grown man.
How can I make him go to the doctor?
Like you made me let him bring his junk.
Do it without telling him.
He has Alzheimer's. He needs help.
You can't let him make the rules.
Grab him and take him to the doctor!
Besides, he can't live here forever.
He's completely mixed up.
Neither of us has the time to look after him.
- I have to go to London tomorrow. - Who'll take Tilda to the doctor?
- I've got my big pitch. - Dad will.
You're joking.
I explained it to him.
- I even made him a neck pouch. - A neck pouch?
- Brown or beige? - Brown.
There's no way. We've just been through this.
You think he can take her to the doctor?
There's no way that will ever work.
What are you doing?
I'm... tidying UP-
Will you remember to pick me up from school
to take me to the doctor?
PICK UP TILDA TOMORROW
- Don't worry, I've got it covered. - You sure?
Absolutely.
Hey, you funny thing, who are you?
I'm Berta.
Hello, Beata.
- Where are we going tomorrow? - To the doctor.
Yes, I know that.
That was just a joke.
- Hey, Dad. Where are you right now? - In London. I told you that.
- Everything groovy? - Yes. Did Grandpa pick you up?
How's the weather in London?
The sun's shining.
- Did Grandpa pick you up? - We're there.
- Where? - At the doctor's.
- Can I talk to him a sec? - The doctor?
No, Grandpa.
Um... He's busy filling out forms right now.
Grandpa's filling out forms?
Yeah.
Okay.
Let me talk to him now.
We're up. Bye!
Hello, I have an appointment.
Oh yes.
- Tilda Rosenbach? - Yes.
- You really are pretty late. - Yes.
- Are you here all alone? - Who do you take with you to the doctor?
That sounds very good. No obstructions.
- You've been wearing socks, right? - Yes.
May I ask you something?
Of course you can.
What's Alzheimer's?
- What makes you ask that? - I think my grandpa has it.
What's given you that idea?
My mom said he has it.
Is your mom a doctor?
No, she works for an advertising agency.
See what I mean.
Why don't you tell me about your grandpa?
Does he sometimes get confused? Forget things?
Sometimes?
Sometimes I get confused or forget things.
It's normal at my age.
So, my lovely lady, I've cooked your favorite cake.
I must have forgotten it in the kitchen.
I'll be back in a sec.
Now, just imagine
that all of these books are your grandpa's brain.
And now, because of this illness,
now and again some of the books start falling over.
The instant one falls, he forgets what's inside it.
Depending on how he's doing, some books might right themselves.
But others fall over instead.
As the illness progresses, ever more fall over.
In the end, the books fall off the shelf completely.
Until one day...
Till he doesn't know anything at all anymore?
Till he doesn't know anything at all!
What can I do to make him better?
What your grandpa needs now
is lots of love from you.
And understanding.
Even when he says or does senseless things.
You have to make him feel that you understand him.
And you have to give him tasks.
That is extremely important for him.
So he feels needed.
What was it I wanted to do here?
Odd.
How did those ever get in there?
Amandus? Oh God!
- What happened? - I'm making a cake.
Oh God!
Don't move an inch!
I'm so sorry.
Everything will be okay. It'll be okay.
Do you think we can still eat the cake?
- Definitely. - Want a piece?
I really have to lose weight.
- Then I'll throw it out. - No.
You're not going to do that.
Damn!
- What are you doing? - Looking for my honey!
- You bake that? - No, your dad.
Try it. It's not as bad as it looks.
- You didn't try it. - Oh yes, for your father.
Well, was it nice in London?
- What's with you? - He forgot about Tilda!
What? He picked her up.
No, she just said that to get him off the hook.
That doesn't matter. I told you it wouldn't work!
And he nearly burnt down the house!
- What happened? - Just look!
Niko,
if I'd come home a bit later, you'd be standing in ruins.
They'd be identifying your dad with dental records!
Luckily, Tilda saw Dr. Ehlers.
But what if you go to Istanbul
and Tilda's left alone with Grandpa?
An accident could happen. You'd be to blame!
You're denying reality! You can't get your father checked out,
yet you can go off to London!
You could've rescheduled your pitch!
No, I couldn't! The deal was you take her to the doctor!
I'm not the freelancer here, you are.
I can't tell Serge, "I can't pitch tomorrow, give me a day."
What did you pitch to him? Your tits?
- What was that? - Tell me, I want to know.
Did your tits make a good impression?
- Nice. - I'm sorry.
Amandus, could you close the toilet door?
Summer vacation finally came.
Mom wanted to take us to Sweden.
Grandpa didn't want to go.
Mom tried to persuade him, but she had no chance.
So she went to Majorca with her mom.
And I spent the whole summer with Grandpa.
We went on lots of walks.
On nice days Dad drove us to the lake.
The other kids thought Grandpa was awesome.
They didn't care at all that he was different to other grandpas.
Dr. Ehlers said people with Alzheimer's
often best remember things from long ago,
and that they really enjoy it when things come back to them.
That's why we looked through his old photo album of Venice a lot.
Although I can recite his stories backwards in my sleep,
it was lovely to see how happy they made him.
- Have I showed you this one before? - No.
Strange, I could've sworn that...
Show me, Grandpa!
Here, the Lido, where we had
loads of trouble with the life...
with the life style...
with the rail guard...
with the life guard.
Because Margarethe wanted to skinny-dip.
How did you talk to him?
How do you say "I love you, Grandpa" in Italian?
Where's that?
That's the... I don't know, it's the...
The Doge...
Boy, oh boy!
There were loads of gulls there.
Grandma really liked them.
Until one of them crapped on her caprese salad.
- A gull? - While she was eating.
- How do you think Grandma reacted? - She cried?
She laughed. Then the same pigeon pooed on her head.
I miss Grandma.
Me too.
I can't wait to see how she looks when I see her again.
How do you mean, when you see her again?
When I die, we'll meet again in heaven.
I don't want you to die.
When I die there'll be a huge bash in heaven.
With all the frills.
When Margarethe and I are back together again
we'll really get the party started.
I don't believe in heaven,
but it was nice he tried to comfort me like that.
Really, I should be comforting him.
After that, I began filming Grandpa lots.
I think he'll be glad to see them when his memory is totally gone.
Like when Mom and Dad show me the videos of me
when I took my first steps.
How does it actually feel?
- What? - When you forget everything?
It's like...
Like having a head full of honey.
All gummed up.
How long have you had honey in your head?
Since I can't remember when.
But what I do have is a...
Wave...
It doesn't matter, because...
Can you help me? I can't get it open.
Here.
- What is that? - Everything's in here.
Everything I need to remember.
I got this from...
- Grandma made this. - May I look?
NIKO, MY SON SARAH, NIKO'S WIFE
MARGARETHE, MY WIFE NO LONGER LIVING
Did Grandma know she was going to die?
I must have written that myself.
She is dead, right?
Yes, Grandpa.
I knew it.
Now it's time for a toast to our dear Amandus.
Toast? I still have a roll here.
Yes,
but we want to drink to you.
- Amandus? - I'm not thirsty.
- Piece of crap! - Let's try again.
Let's all drink to you, to your birthday.
I'm not thirsty!
Do you have Alzheimer's or something?
Enjoy.
What the hell!
Olive oil is...
good for the skin.
- Has your party chosen? - What? SPD's my party.
Willy Brandt, he's my man.
I'm not allowed to vote here,
but if I could, I'd choose him as well.
Without a doubt.
Here.
Thanks.
Can you be any louder?
- That's vile! - Please mind your own business.
Thank you.
Bud, don't you know who I am?
Who?
- Some actor. - Pardon me.
Are we childhood friends?
Why did you call me bud?
That man is sick.
- Then he should stay home. - The door is over there.
You listen to me...
- I want to talk to the boss. - I am the boss, you jerk.
Now go.
I don't need your money.
- Come on, dear. - Have a nice evening.
Now then?
I'll have the sea bream,
with green asparagus, al dente.
- And for you, madam? - The tuna tartare.
- And you? - Spaghetti with butter, please.
Good choice. Our specialty.
- For you, sir'? -What sir does he mean?
What do you want to eat?
- Of course. - Since when do you eat liver?
I don't know.
What do I usually eat?
Caprese salad?
Capra. .. what'?
- Two buffalo mozzarellas. - Of course.
Don't cry, Dad.
Everything's fine.
Grandpa, what's wrong?
This is just all so t...
Tough?
Trerri...
Terrible.
It just feels so rotten and terrible.
Because I just don't know anything anymore.
Everything's a void.
When I want to write something down,
but can't.
Something inside
just makes it impossible to do.
Do you remember what you wanted to write?
You write it down for me.
For Tilda,
my beloved...
Granddaughter?
I'll tell you what to write.
Okay.
The day will come...
when I'll no longer be able...
When I'll no longer know...
that you are...
who you are.
You, you, you...
It may even end up happening that...
In any case, there is one thing I want you to know.
I love you
and you are the best princess
that I could ever have wished for.
Don't act like a gangsta
Yo! You come round makin' trouble
But you were prancing like a ballerina
You are a...
But that don't make you no badass...
Sit down!
Is he ill?
Mr. Rosenbach?
Yes, that's me.
Or is it you? You go instead.
You sit.
No, Mr. Rosenbach.
I'd like to talk to you. Dr. Holst.
- Holes? - Holst.
With "st".
- How are you? - Didn't you ask that?
No.
- So? - So what?
How are you today?
Now you did just ask me that.
That's true.
So? What's your answer?
To what?
To the question "How are you today?"
Don't you have any other questions handy?
-It's getting boring. - Who's with you today?
My parents.
Is it possible that she's your granddaughter?
Yep. Sounds right.
- Can you tell me how old she is? - She has a lot of life ahead of her.
Do you know how old she is?
Nope.
I don't even know how old I was
when you were born.
Back then you were
61 years old.
Mr. Rosenbach.
How much is nine plus three?
You don't know that?
- And you're a doctor? - Yes.
Now I have a question. What color is the inside of a fridge?
- Mr. Rosenbach... - Answer my question.
- White. - What does a cow drink?
- Milk. - Cows drink water.
That was a good one, wasn't it?
Yes.
Now, if you would please excuse me.
Where are you going, Mr. Rosenbach?
- I have things to do. - I'd like to finish our talk first.
Yes, my...
my assistant
will make you an appointment.
I have surgery now.
For our summer party, Mom and Grandpa
agreed he'd stay in his room.
In exchange, he would get to watch the big fireworks show at midnight.
The woman Mom's speaking to is Nora. Dad can't stand her.
She told him Mom didn't cheat on him,
but was just trying to save their marriage.
The guy with the weird gait is Serge, the Christmas party guy.
Dad likes him even less than Nora.
He tells Mom he'll hit him if he sees him.
Dad used to be a boxer,
so I wonder why Mom even invited him here at all.
Serge, what are you doing here?
What kind of greeting is that?
- Niko knows about us. - What?
- How on earth does he know? - I told him.
Shit, you should've told me!
- I wouldn't be here. - I didn't invite you.
Inoflced.
I did wonder. I figured you forgot.
- I'll clear it up. - No, you'll leave now.
Shit!
Why did she tell him?
Because she's stupid.
- What on earth do you look like? -|...
prettied myself up.
And what are you doing?
I'm eating these little...
These little knobs here.
Yes, these um... salt...
- Have you sucked all of them? - They're superb.
This is my party-
You are not on the guest list.
We talked about this. I want you to go back to your room.
- But... -"Pop ldol" is on.
Hello, Amandus!
- No, don't! - How delightful to see you!
You're dressed to kill.
- Do we know each other? - Have you already forgotten?
You did me five times last night.
Only five times?
Great line!
Amandus is back!
You old soldier.
- No, we're going to party. - Mom, leave him.
- Then we'll drink. -It's a bad time.
Serge. Get the hell out of here now!
If you buy three, you get one for free.
Okay, I'll take three.
I take my hat off! The music's great.
I agree.
We used to have LPs back in the day.
Hey, Willi, we need more ignition cord.
IGNITION
- Niko, there's a problem. - What?
Promise not to flip out.
- Why should I? - Do you promise?
- I promise. - Serge is here.
- Where? - Here.
- You're joking. - I'm not.
- He's at my part3'? - Our party.
- I didn't invite him. - Then tell him to scram.
I can't, he's my boss.
Okay, I'll talk to him.
Niko, my good man.
You may wonder why I'm here.
Although I wasn't invited...
Niko!
Serge, I'm so very sorry.
I understand.
The thing with your wife was dumb...
Where's the DJ?
The Russians are coming.
- What is it, Dad? - I love you.
You've never said that before.
Have I ever told you how much I love you?
If you have, then...
then I've forgotten.
But don't take that personally.
Where has Sandra gone?
She moved in with her mother for a few days.
- Why would she do that? - Dad!
Did the two of you get in a fight?
- Don't you remember anything? - No.
All gone.
-L... - Oh, Dad...
All that's left in there is...
a void.
It's never clear how it'll progress.
Rapid deterioration may occur after a long period of stability.
Luckily, he still has a sense of humor.
He'll recall old jokes, stories,
even if he's forgotten how to walk.
The question that you have to answer is
are you ready to care for him?
If you do ever reach the stage where you decide
you can no longer give your father the care
that you personally feel he requires,
then your honesty will benefit him.
I know what you're going through.
My father had dementia too.
I know the internal struggle,
helplessness, guilty conscience, all the blame you put on yourself.
But, eventually,
he'll have to be taken to a nursing home.
Try to reserve a spot for your father now.
Good nursing homes have very long waiting lists.
Chaleema Tea and Coffee.
- Hi, Pam. - Hi, honey. How are you?
- Good. And you? - Great, cutie.
- Can I speak to Dad? - He's looking at a home for your gramps.
That can't be true.
We shouldn't kid ourselves. Few want to move in here at first.
But they usually adjust quickly.
Look at those two over there.
They met yesterday. Now look.
They have a daily routine, which is essential to them,
and they needn't be ashamed, as they're all in the same boat.
Hello!
No way!
I'm Hildegard.
- You can call me Gerdi if you like. - Okay.
We've known each other a while now.
No, we haven't. I'm Niko Rosenbach.
How about the two of us have a bit of a fuck?
Just a teensy-weensy one?
Hildegard?
That'll do for now. Okay?
You can think it over.
Yes.
Yes, sexuality is another issue
with Alzheimer's patients.
You could do it in here too.
For some more than others.
Hildegard thinks of nothing else.
Their pasts play a key role. Hildegard was a dancer in a...
Or here.
Bar.
That's how her daughter described her work.
How do I explain this to my dad?
Don't. He won't understand it.
It's like taking a kid to day care the first time.
It cries, throws itself on the floor.
You feel guilty, but after three days it won't leave.
It'll be good for him.
Hello, Dad.
Dad?
Yes?
I'm on the can and there's no paper. Can you bring me some?
Here.
Thanks.
- Something wrong? - Where were you?
- I was in the office, then shopping. - Shopping?
Where are your shopping bags?
- In the car. - You didn't go shopping.
- And you weren't in the office. - I was.
Don't lie.
Pam said you were looking at a home for Grandpa!
Ah, stupid woman.
Can you go now! Can't you see I have to crap.
I'd never put you in an old folks' home!
I hate you!
Grandpa, what are you thinking about?
- Grandpa? - Venice.
Tell me about the pigeon pooping on Grandma's mozzarella again.
Grandma and I wanted to take you there.
When you were older.
To show you where we...
We...
Did you know
that Hamburg has more bridges than Venice?
- I don't believe that. - Shall we look and see?
- Where? - In Venice, silly.
Nowadays I can't even find my way to...
to thingamajig.
What if we went together?
I'm useless now.
Niko. About time.
- Can I speak to Sarah? - She's asleep.
At this hour?
Yes. She hasn't slept a wink the last couple of nights.
Can I come in?
- Why didn't you call? - Because I didn't run off?
Don't play the macho card with me!
You ruined her party, and you made sure
that absolutely everyone knows about Serge.
- Bang-up job. - I'm sorry.
- Tell her that. - How, if I can't come in?
- How's Amandus doing? - Really crappy.
- And how's my little girl? - The same. That's why I'm here.
It's good to see you.
I'm sorry.
See! That wasn't so hard.
MOm!
- Why is Grandpa in bed with you? - He had a bad dream.
That the Russians were coming.
You really are a wonderful girl.
- I am so proud of you. - Is that why you took off?
- Did you read my letter? - Yes.
But you can't just leave like that.
Listen, I went...
to my mother's because...
Because I was so distraught.
- I didn't know what to do. - Are you splitting up?
No.
Your dad and I love each other.
At least that's something.
Dad's so sad you said you hated him.
I tried to comfort him.
I told him women sometimes say things they don't really mean.
I do mean it!
- He wants to put Grandpa in a home! - Honey...
You've seen that I can look after him.
Tilda,
you have to go back to school and we have to work.
- Besides, he just viewed the home. - So he can take him there.
Grandpa's still living with us,
but at some point he'll be so ill he can't live here anymore.
He'll need a nice nursing home where he's looked after.
Somewhere where we can visit him all the time
and take him out to do nice things.
You two work all the time.
- Then we'll work less. - Right!
I promise.
"I promise."
Mom and Dad always promise to work less
but they've never done it.
Smylla's Dad said
that breaking promises to their kids
is the worst thing parents can do.
I was up all night thinking about
what Dr. Ehlers told me,
and about Grandpa.
About the fact that he needs a purpose.
Grandpa?
Grandpa, wake up!
They're back?
No, they're sleeping.
Good.
As long as the enemy is sleeping, we're safe and sound.
Exactly! Now let's go conquer Italy.
- I have to go to my office. - No, Grandpa, you're on vacation.
I'll pack your stuff. Outside, in ten minutes.
What are you waiting for? Drive!
You have to drive.
I've forgotten how to start one of these things.
Put your foot on the clutch.
Try again.
Purrs like a kitten.
Now put your foot on the gas.
Get up! They're trying to steal our car.
That must've been reverse.
No shit, Sherlock.
Hey!
I'll shift, you work the pedals.
- C)Kay? ~Okay_
Get up!
- What are you doing? - What does it look like?
You try.
Grandpa!
- Grandpa, it's red! - We can still make it.
- That sure was close. - What are you doing?
Green no...
red go.
Just drive, Grandpa.
- Right? - Left!
The train station is to the left.
ONE WAY
The plate is HH, for Hamburg.
Anthracite gray, like I just said. Yes, stolen from the yard.
This isn't Naples!
Italy!
Okay.
Ah, is the lord of the manor awake now?
Like some buttered toast? Fresh-squeezed OJ?
You may have other worries. Dad and Tilda are gone.
- Don't shit me. - I'm not shitting you.
- A "tentative" search? - Yes.
- You can't do more? - No.
"To protect and serve"? As if!
Your father drove off with your daughter.
Did you think we'd send out an infrared search helicopter?
- What? - He's an adult. This isn't a case for us.
His father has dementia and our daughter's 11!
Yes, you've already said that.
We'll contact you. Go back home, they'll be there.
I know from experience.
- Two tickets to Venice. - Single?
No, I need one for my Grandpa too.
- No, do you want a round trip? - What's cheaper?
A single.
- Then two of those. - Age?
Yes, that's Grandpa's problem.
- No, what age are you? - Oh, eleven.
Eleven!
- You ride for free. - Great!
That'll be 224 euros, please.
Do you have money with you?
You have to enter a PIN.
- Grandpa? -1916.
- Are you sure? - Yes, the Battle of Verdun.
The Battle of Verdun?
First World War.
Great job, Grandpa.
Many thanks.
Well then, have a nice journey and have fun in Venice.
- How does he know where we're going? -It's on here.
I...
got to... I...
- What have you got to do? Jthappened.
No big deal. It's happened to me too.
We have clothes with us.
- Don't tell me I forgot pants! - This can't be so...
- No way! - Shit!
Shit!
I can help you, Grandpa.
Something wrong?
- I heard that. - That wasn't me.
- Sure, Grandpa. - That really wasn't me.
Done!
I swore I'd never do this.
"Today I spoke to Dr. Ehlers about Grandpa,
about Alzheimer's, and happiness and joy.
Joy is the most important thing.
It's the best kind of brain fertilizer.
It repairs the brain.
Dr. Ehlers said you can only attain your goals
if you find joy in pursuing them.
But many old people no longer have goals
because they have no one to bring joy to and no one is proud of them.
No one needs them.
That's why they get sick: their brain shrivels up
and they can't repair it, because they don't have fun anymore.
Maybe Mom and Dad...
should have visited Grandma and Grandpa more often.
But they couldn't, because they have to work so much.
When Grandma died, Grandpa didn't have a purpose anymore.
But if I can give him a new purpose
and can make him feel that I really need him for it,
then maybe he'll get better.
I just don't know what yet..."
Evening.
Berta is tired.
Where are the sleeping cars?
Where you can lie down?
They're up front a bit.
I'm back.
I love your breasts.
Margarethe...
- Filthy man! - What is it?
He wanted to rape me!
- Yeah, you wish. - He did!
He grabbed my breasts!
Grandpa got the wrong compartment.
He has Alzheimer's.
Alois. Alois Alzheimer.
Thomas.
Thomas Muller.
Three goals against Portugal.
Could you kindly ask this woman
to vacate our Portugal...
our compartment?
This isn't your compartment.
It's her compartment.
It's her compartment?
Yes, well then...
It was a pleasure.
By the WHY.
Your wife...
She's very soft and nice to the touch.
Thanks for the compliment.
Did you hear that, dear?
This way, Grandpa.
Sorry for the disturbance. Good night.
Here.
Hi, Mom. Hi, Dad.
I hope you guys are okay. Don't worry about us.
Could you tell me where the toilet can is?
Here.
- You have chips in your hair. - Do you want one?
Thanks.
Toilet.
Oh shit!
Grandpa!
No way!
Hello?
This way.
Maybe we should just surrender.
No! It's Venice or bust.
- I could stay and stall them. - Grandpa!
Hey, we're closed!
- I think you got the wrong door. - That way, Grandpa.
Sweet.
We'll wait till they're gone.
Those pretty ladies?
No, the police.
I have to wee.
All right.
Grandpa?
I have to go on that toilet.
- But sit down! - Yes, Grandpa.
Grandma always sat down too.
No way!
She did.
We're sitting on a train, as you see.
And we had breakfast. Chips, because they're so healthy.
Your little girl sure is sweet.
Yes, a train compartment.
- So what now? - It could be anywhere.
- Anywhere on a train! - Exactly.
We've informed the railway police. They'll contact us once they find them.
- Trust me, Mrs... - Rosenbach.
Mrs. Rosenbach, look on the bright side.
They're on a train, they're well, and having loads of fun.
Hello?
Hello there?
Hello?
Who's there?
The mayor.
Could you please open the door for me?
I can't.
I can't get the thing... This thing here...
Just turn the latch to the right.
- To the right. - I don't know how to...
- Grandpa, is it the police? - No.
The mayor.
The mayor thing was just a joke. I'm Erdal, the cleaner.
You're the girl with the grandpa who has Alzheimer's.
Who has Alzheimer's?
- How do you know that? - Hey, this is Bolzano.
You're breaking news. What did you do?
Nothing.
Nothing? I heard you pulled the emergency brake.
- Messed up the timetable. - I'd have lost my grandpa if I hadn't.
Well, we can't have that. Where are you two from?
- We're from Hamburg. - Hamburg?
- Me too. - Really?
What am I going to do with you?
- Can you help us? - Sure, Hamburgers have to stick together.
What are you doing?
I can't sleep.
Come to bed. It's four a.m.
- Still looking for your honey? - Yes. Why?
Then come here, you have to see this.
I asked him over and over if he'd seen it.
Do you know what he said?
"I'm allergic to honey."
- Shameless! - Should I get us wine?
It's dark in here.
- Careful, cops. - Did he say cows?
Are you nuts?
"MOO!"
said the cow.
"MOO!"
said the cow.
What would you say if I quit?
- You love your job. - I want to be there for Tilda and Amandus.
- Are you sure about that? - Yeah.
It'd be great.
I should've done it long ago.
I'm supposed to say hi from Serge. He's grateful to you.
Why?
Well, he had the dentist put in
a new incisor with a diamond in it.
Now he says he's an even bigger hit with the ladies.
I don't believe that.
He did.
See for yourself.
No way!
Hello, I'm Erdal, I'm...
Hello, I'm Erdal.
Born in Hamburg, 1983, but not a German.
I'm integrated and speak perfect German, but still a foreigner.
What are you trying to say?
If my parents had been from Sudetenland, I'd be German.
It's unfair.
Whatever, now South Tyrol is my home.
A real South Tyrolean.
Accent mishmash, but...
Erdal, get to the point!
Okay. Dear... What's your mom's name?
- Sandra. - Sandra. All right.
Dear Sandra, dear Niko, don't worry.
Your lovely daughter Tilda is doing great.
Once this guy here and this little girl right here
see the City of Love, she'll call.
- Then you can pick them up. - Great!
- Really? Thanks. - Now we can do that again.
What? That was my best.
It's off!
You sent it?
- Great! - You said it was great.
- Didn't you hear the way I said it? - No.
- They know where we're going! -"City of Love."
- That could be Paris. - Right.
From Hamburg via South Tyrol to Paris?
Why not? You can go from Berlin to Hamburg via the Black Forest.
Hey, there he is!
...see the City of Love, she'll call. Then you can pick them up.
They're heading to Venice.
- That's insane! - That's his purpose.
It's "buenos dias", "noches" is night.
- There's no moon, see? - Sure, Professor.
- Are those my passengers? - Yep.
Hi, I'm Emre.
I'm your getaway driver.
All right then, hop in your limo.
They're going to Venice too?
Sure, they've never been.
- Can't we sit up front? - You may be seen.
Avanti! Or they'll close the border.
- Europe has no borders now. - I was joking.
Right.
- Thanks, Erdal. - Look after Gramps.
You're an awesome girl. I'm proud of you.
Thanks for the pants.
No problem, I have plenty of them.
I think it's sensational!
- Hi, Mom. - She's sensational!
- She got that from me. - Why so chipper?
Because what she's doing is grand.
Really. Sensational!
Don't make that face!
It is grand.
- But I'm worried. - Tilda's no fool.
She'll be there. And it's good for you to get out of here.
We'll call when we land. Tell us if they call you.
Yes, sir. Aye-aye. I'll drink to you.
Have fun, you two!
Now, where's the Calvados?
It stinks.
Oh, I love that smell.
Well now, you're a lovely girl.
How do you know it's a girl?
From her face.
But she has balls.
- Where? - Certainly not on her face.
- Fuck! - What is it?
909$
Shit.
- What can I do for you? - License and registration, please.
Sure thing.
What are you looking for?
What do you...
Sheep.
Can I go now?
Open up.
Have you never seen sheep?
Open up.
Please.
They smell pretty nasty.
Get out of the vehicle.
- And open up. - Now?
NOW!
It's like magic.
She's damn clever, that girl.
I meant the sheep.
I don't know which one yet.
I'll call you first when I find out. Got a card?
How long are you staying?
- Not sure yet. - Wait and see, eh?
All I have are two suites.
Then we'll take a suite, eh?
It's very nice.
However, it does cost...
-1,800 euros. - For a single night?
Insanity! Let's get another hotel.
Just pretend the price is in lire.
We'll take the suite.
Your signature, please.
You won't regret it.
That suite has been the scene
of the conception of many a bambino.
No more sandwiches.
What a lot of funny lines.
How are you supposed to find your way?
We can share the apple.
You can have it.
- I'm in the mood for sheep. - Sheep?
We could catch ourselves one.
We're not going to eat a sheep!
Just a really little one?
Half of one?
- Half a little one? - Have half an apple.
Would you say you're scared of being dead?
Grandpa?
No.
I am.
You have a few days ahead of you.
No, I mean I'm scared of you being dead.
You don't need to be.
Grandma and I will look after you from up there.
We'll look after you.
We'll be so proud of you.
Whenever you miss me,
just look up.
You just look up at me,
and then I'll be there with you.
Did you say something?
I just said that it's lovely being with you.
Can I help you?
We're hungry.
I would very much like to give you the tomatoes.
But they're for the vegetable market in Bolzano.
Come with me.
In the name of the Father,
the Son and the Holy Spirit.
Amen.
Come Lord Jesus and be our guest
and let these gifts to us be blest.
Well, a tomato and onion salad
would be a bit more appetiz...
more appealing. - Grandpa!
The tomatoes are to sell at the market in Bolzano.
- That's what we live off. - The market?
That reminds me of a joke.
A nun says to a farmer who is selling veg at a market,
"I'd like a cucumber."
Then the farmer says to her,
"Take two, you'll have one to eat."
I don't get it.
What's not to get?
If she eats one
she has the other...
To eat the next day.
What do you do here all day?
Can I just quickly explain my joke?
No, Grandpa.
Is it true that you're not allowed to have sex?
Yes, my child.
- We're chaste. - Like I said.
Cucumber.
Chaste?
What does that mean?
We abstain from loving a man or letting a man love us.
We reserve that place for God.
So you could kind of say that you're all married to God?
You can say that.
So no one can get jealous or cheat on anyone else.
Can my parents visit you here some time?
Why do you ask that, my child?
I think they could learn a lot from you guys.
In purgatory you can prove yourself and atone for sins.
Then God will decide if you go to heaven or hell.
Do you believe in heaven?
Of course.
Heaven makes our lives complete.
When we die we all go there to live with God.
Do you think my grandpa will go to heaven?
After all you've told me
about him,
I'm certain he will.
- Really? - Yes.
You're a good girl.
The journey that you are on is a special one.
- Looking for something? - Um, Elisa...
Margarethe.
- She was just here. - He means my grandma.
She's already in heaven.
Come on, Grandpa. We'll look for her.
I think I saw her back there.
I think she's back there.
Grandma?
Gretchen?
Grandma?
Margarethe?
Grandma, is that you?
She sure hid herself well.
Grandma?
Where is she?
We'll find her.
Grandma?
- Grand pa. - Yes?
- I've found her. - Where?
There!
God, you're so beautiful.
I've missed you so much!
I stayed here with Grandma.
You sure?
Pretty sure.
1.800?!
I'm very sorry. It's our last room.
It's just lire. I'd say that's about...
two marks.
Will you be paying cash
or with a credit card?
The Battle of Verdun?
Verdun?
Sign this, please.
Why do all Italian men
have moustaches?
Because they want to look like their mothers.
Like their mothers!
Who the heck is that?
Who?
That guy-
That's you, Grandpa.
That one is you, and this one is me.
Tilda.
Look at me...
I'm aping everything I do.
Look!
Look, I'm doing it again.
Just look.
You have to put the brush head on first.
Like this.
Brush your teeth with toothpaste.
This is meant for shaving.
Open up.
You're doing a great job, Grandpa.
It tickles my nose.
You're the funniest grown-up I know.
There are still
so many things I can learn from you.
Nonsense, Grandpa.
You just need to stop unlearning things.
I had such a great day with you.
Good night, Grandpa.
Good night.
I know this sounds crazy, but I get the feeling they're very near.
I had a lovely day with you today.
Today?
We were a team, like we used to be.
- We can thank our daughter for that. - True.
I love you.
Do you hear the birds too?
That doesn't sound good at all.
What's the problem, boy?
Calm down, brownie.
He's green.
That's what one says to horses.
Can I help?
I'll take care of it. I'm a doctor.
I have to keep laughing about yourjoke.
- Joke? - Yes.
The joke you told just before.
It was nice.
It was good, really good.
It was amazing.
What did I want?
Oh, yes.
How do I get to the beach from here?
- You mean the Lido. - Yes, I know that place.
But you can't go there now!
It's the middle of the night!
- Have you seen my grandpa? - Grandpa?
Grandpa! Grandpa!
Stop!
Thank God! I've searched all over for you.
Grandpa?
Talking to me, miss?
Don't joke around, Grandpa.
You gave me enough of a scare not being in the hotel.
It's me, Tilda. Your granddaughter.
I don't know you.
But I'm your little princess!
We're both named Rosenbach and we came here together.
You're my grandpa.
- Come on, let's go back to the hotel. - Leave me alone.
Go away. Go, go, go!
"To Tilda, my beloved granddaughter,
the day will come when I'll no longer know
that you are who you are.
In any case, you have to remember one thing.
I love you and you are the best princess
that I could ever have wished for."
Crap!
Morn! Dad!
There you are!
Honey!
I'm so proud of you.
Oh, honey.
Grandpa's on the bench. He doesn't know who I am anymore.
Dad!
Good heavens, it's beautiful here.
Do you remember this? You ate here with Mom after your wedding.
Let me...
I can do it alone!
I'm not a child anymore!
Isn't there any booze?
I'm hungry.
Here, let me.
All right, open your mouth.
A Forst, please.
Nine months later my little brother came.
It was Mom's idea to call him Amandus, after Grandpa.
I don't think Grandpa really understood that.
He kept asking what the baby was named and where he came from.
But I think Grandpa did understand
that Morn and Dad had more time for him.
Mom quit.
And they made good on what they promised
and at least tried to work less.
Grandpa stayed with us at first.
A woman
helped us look after him.
Grandpa liked her a lot.
Eventually, he only wanted her to feed him.
He said she was a highly talented young lady.
But, eventually, she decided to leave us.
Grandpa liked her blouse too much.
When Grandpa went to a home, we'd pick him up
and take him out to do things.
Mom and I took him to the Alster Arcades to eat honey ice cream.
Dad had to look after little Amandus.
Sometimes he liked it,
sometimes he didn't.
He said it was much too cold.
I went to see Dr. Ehlers a few more times too.
He told me
Alzheimer's patients feel more than we know.
He said they need affection,
so spending as much time with them as possible is important.
Even if it doesn't seem that way, they appreciate it.
On our last day out there was a huge storm.
It was a massive downpour, like heaven was crying.
But we stayed at our table in the cafe
and just laughed.
The next day, his heart stopped beating.
I am so glad that I was with him at the time.
I mean, I was with him every day,
except when I had my tonsils taken out.
"Toward the end of the week, southwest winds
paired with heavy rainfall will bring back late-summer temperatures."
Who cares about this stuff?
It's always says the same.
Not me.
Who are you? You sure are a pretty...
A pretty...
It's me, Grandpa. Tilda.
I know who you are.
You're my little princess.
Forever.
Take good care of him, Grandma.
I'm going to miss you, Grandpa.
God, you giveth life and you taketh it away.
Sure and certain of your love and mercy,
we bid farewell to Amandus Rosenbach.
We hereby commit his body to the ground, in hope of resurrection to eternal life
through our Lord Jesus Christ.
Earth to earth,
ashes to ashes,
dust to dust.
Where is Tilda?
She didn't want to be at Grandpa's burial.
She's back there in the field.
We're to go get her when it's over.
Grandpa?
Did you say something?